5 Tips To Set And Maintain Boundaries During The Holidays

With the holidays coming up, you’ll probably be enjoying a lot of festivities and gatherings with friends and loved ones. But, with that always comes some dread of having the obligation to do things you may not want to do or see people you don’t particularly want to see or enjoy talking to.

The holidays can get a bit sticky when it comes to keeping your boundaries. There’s more people that you don’t really have a choice in associating with that may cross or violate them during gatherings and events.

For the sake of your mental and emotional health, it’s important to set yourself up for success and have a plan in place for setting and maintaining your personal boundaries during the holidays.

Know your boundaries and what stresses you out

Something that will help you properly prepare for certain situations during the holiday season is knowing exactly what boundaries you want to set, as well as what stresses you out. Make a list of these BEFORE you go into holiday situations and gatherings. This will help you identify your limits and figure out when it’s time to take the next step to ensure your boundaries are maintained.

Clearly communicate your boundaries

This is where a lot of us go wrong when it comes to maintaining our boundaries, especially the people-pleasers. It can be sooo hard to stand up for yourself, especially in certain settings or with certain people where you feel like you need to be more “courteous” and not cause “drama.” But, people don't have the same boundaries, so it’s important to let others know yours. Tell them so they are aware and can adjust accordingly. And, if they don’t respect them, don’t be afraid to SPEAK UP.

Say no whenever you want

Don’t be a “Yes Man” - it’s time to take back control and learn to say no. I know this is hard in general, ESPECIALLY during the holidays when you feel obligated to appease everyone for the sake of the season. But, for your own peace of mind, it’s time to say no to people, events, and situations that don’t serve you or that diminish your mental health. If you are uncomfortable flat-out saying “no,” come up with a few other ways to turn something down that you feel more comfortable using. Don’t feel obligated to do anything you don’t want to.

Remove yourself from situations

Know your limits, and be ready to remove yourself from certain situations as needed. It’s okay to take yourself out of the equation if you’re uncomfortable. Having an escape plan will make this much easier. Come up with some ways to get yourself out of a situation ahead of time so you can be prepared in the moment.

Stand by your decisions

Stand firm in your decisions when it comes to setting and maintaining your boundaries. Be totally and completely unapologetic. You don’t need to make anyone else feel happy or comfortable if it means violating your own boundaries and happiness. Don’t apologize, and don’t feel bad for prioritizing your own mental health.

Creating healthy boundaries, in general, is super important for your mental health. During the holidays, they’re that much more important. Sure, you might find you need to compromise a little bit in some ways during the holidays - but that doesn’t mean your feelings aren’t valid and that you should risk your mental wellness and your peace. Going into this season with a plan will guide you and make maintaining your boundaries much easier.